GROpinion
[Opinion] How To Be A Nigerian Lawyer
By Chuckwudi Iwuchukwu
This is for the new Nigerian lawyers inducted into the bar yesterday . Congratulations to the new wigs and this article is a must read for you
Life is challenging. There is a reason your poor family decided to pool resources to send you to Law School. They didn’t send you there to take the long route – serving some stingy senior lawyer or law firm for 5-10 years before you can afford to make it on your own. I will treat the issue of stingy senior lawyers another day.
When people ask me how it feels like to be a lawyer, I often save them from the disappointment that the truth is sure to give them; I shrug, smile and add to whatever mystery already exists in their head.
But you, my faithful reader – especially you, the new wig called to the bar yesterday – I will tell the truth. I want you to, at least, like your banker colleagues, be able to afford to pay your own rent and buy a clean second hand car in the first to second year after your call to the Nigerian Bar.
Register your private law firm before Monday next week and print your letter head and complimentary cards before the incorporation is done.
Your cards especially should have your full and imposing title: Barrister and Solicitor of the Supreme Court of Nigeria. I mean a lawyer knows that’s all hot air but to a non-lawyer it makes you seem like you learnt under Saint Paul himself and have your office right in the Supreme Court. Hustling must start immediately, whether you work in a law firm or not.
Learn how to eavesdrop on people’s conversation for any possible legal services they may need. Somebody’s wife was slapped. Apologise for butting in, then quickly inform them that under our legal system, that is a crime called assault. You are a lawyer and you can help them. By help, you mean take their money. If they look at you funny, whip out your card. They will see that full title, which is a killer. Suddenly you will appear more intelligent, more important.
When you walk into a big store, don’t just buy stuff and leave. If you can see the manager, ask if they have registered their business with the Corporate Affairs Commission. Company registration is a no-brainer. Yes, serious lawyers snub it but what do you care? Offer to register their business for less than what your colleagues charge. If your older colleagues are charging 100,000 for incorporation, please charge 40k to do same.
The idea is turn over. If you have many companies to register at the same time, it won’t matter that you are charging less (and spoiling business for older hustling lawyers).
You must never ignore police stations. There is always money to be made there. Anyone who calls you a charge and bail lawyer, God will punish them and judge them harshly for your sake.
Take keen interest in the affairs of your neighbours. There is always someone dragging someone to the police station or someone being arrested for something.
Don’t wait until you are called. Go there and offer your services. Trouble is your business.
The art of securing bail is one that only the streetwise can handle. No one will teach you that in school. They teach you crap like “bail is free” and “no one must be held for more than 24 hours without charge”. Bah! The Police in Nigeria don’t care what you’ve been taught, in fact, the more legal you get, the more complicated things get for your prospective client. And trust me there is nothing worse than messing up a neighbour’s case. You don’t want to be sneaking into your own neighbourhood at odd hours. I have only, in my four years of legal practice, secured one free bail. And that was only because the DPO was on the Investigating Police Officer’s (IPO) case for something else. I cashed in on his confusion and by the time he realised I was not going to give him any money, my client had been released and bond papers signed. He, however, took me to the side and gave me a good talking to: “Na you make your client no give us anything abi?”
Moral of the story? Common sense is more useful than law inside a Police Station. You have no friends inside a Police Station. Bail is hardly ever free.
You must learn to negotiate with the IPO firmly, respectfully and pragmatically. Learn this and you will become hot cake in your community, making so much money that you won’t care if anyone calls you charge and bail.
To avoid the stereotypical look of the struggling Nigerian Lawyer – shirts that were once white, shoe soles eaten to a 45 degree angle, a heavy tattered bag containing everything from your wig and gown to dozens of company registration forms and affidavit forms – you need to also be an estate agent. You must befriend as many landlords as you can so that you will have signboards reading “TO LET” on as many empty houses as possible.
Look for people trying to sell houses or land and help them aggressively market it. You never know which 10% commission will take you permanently out of poverty.
When you have sold that expensive house and ride home in a Range Rover Sport (with NBA stickers in front and behind) no one will bother if you ever go to court or not.
Your neighbours that live in the same estate with you will hail you as you drive past: ‘Barristaa!’
Linda Ikeji bought her Banana island house for 500 million. Imagine how much that the lawyer who sealed the deal for the seller of the property went home with?
It is no surprise that struggling lawyers are the most hated in their families. The reason is simple. After supporting you morally and otherwise to become a lawyer, the least they expect from you is to make reasonable contributions at family events and send money into their accounts when they call you.
God forbid that you become a struggling Nigerian lawyer. I reject that for you in Jesus name.
Follow my advice and your family and neighbours will think you are the best thing since point-and-kill.
As always, God bless your hustle.
GROpinion
Insecurity In Zamfara – Hold Lawal Accountable, Not Matawalle
Writes Nasiru Aliyu, Media Advisor to the Hon. Minister
The recent protest organized by the All Progressives Congress (APC) Akida Forum raises significant questions about political motivations and accountability.
Led by Musa Mahmoud the APC AKIDA group staged a demonstration at the Abuja headquarters of the Department of State Services (DSS), demanding an investigation into the Minister of State for Defence, Dr. Bello Mohammed Matawalle, amid allegations linking him to banditry in the state.
The protest, predominantly featuring hired women and youths from Abuja, was framed as a response to escalating security concerns in Zamfara.
However, the underlying motives appear to be rooted in political rivalry rather than genuine concern for public safety.
The leader of the APC Akida Forum Tijjani Ramallan claims that Governor Dauda Lawal has accused Matawalle of collusion with bandits, suggesting that such ties have perpetuated the insecurity plaguing the region.
A critical point overlooked by Mahmoud and his supporters is that Matawalle is no longer the executive governor of Zamfara.
The current governor, Dauda Lawal, now holds the title of the state’s chief security officer, and therefore, he bears the primary responsibility for addressing the security crisis.
Instead of engaging in a blame game, Lawal should focus on implementing effective strategies to combat the rampant insecurity and provide the dividends of democracy to the people of Zamfara state.
The animosity towards Matawalle seems to stem from his previous role as the Director General of Bola Ahmed Tinubu’s campaign in the Northwest, where he played a pivotal role in securing significant electoral support for the current president.
This success has reportedly fueled envy among some political figures like Tijjani Ramallan, including Musa Mahmoud and others who may feel threatened by Matawalle’s rising profile.
It is noteworthy that allegations against Matawalle have been investigated by the National Security Adviser’s office, which found no evidence to support claims of his involvement in banditry.
This investigation contributed to President Bola Ahmed Tinubu’s decision to retain Matawalle in his ministerial position, where he has reportedly managed security matters in the Northwest with professionalism.
Adding to the complexity of this situation, a Kano High Court recently issued a restraining order against Governor Lawal and others, prohibiting them from continuing their smear campaign against Matawalle. This legal development underscores the court’s recognition of the potential harm caused by unfounded allegations and the need for accountability in political discourse and the state government has found an ally in APC AKIDA led by Tijjani Ramallan.
Despite the court’s intervention, Governor Lawal continues to leverage media platforms to tarnish Matawalle’s reputation, linking him to banditry and corruption without substantiating evidence.
Such tactics appear to be desperate attempts to undermine Matawalle’s credibility, likely motivated by Lawal’s desire to solidify his political standing.
The ongoing campaign against Matawalle by Lawal and his associates raises serious concerns about the integrity of political discourse in Zamfara.
It is imperative for the public to remain vigilant against misleading narratives and to recognize the broader implications of such political maneuvers.
The Kano High Court’s ruling serves as a reminder of the importance of due process and the need for responsible governance.
In conclusion, the focus of accountability in Zamfara should shift towards Governor Dauda Lawal, who now holds the reins of security in the state.
Instead of casting blame on former officials, Lawal must take ownership of the security situation and work towards tangible solutions that prioritize the safety and well-being of the people of Zamfara.
Furthermore, since Matawalle operational visit to sokoto led to the elimination of Bandit leader Halilu Sububu who is alleged to have died with the treasure of the sponsors of banditry in zamfara state, the pain propelled them to further embark on campaign of calumny.
The recent activities of some individuals with one Davids Iyida attempting to sabotage the MoMo Payment Service Bank project intended to benefit, especially Enugu Ezike people, have raised significant concern and outrage within the community.
Such actions aimed at undermining a project with immense potential to uplift and empower the people of Enugu Ezike can only be described as malicious.
The MoMo PSB project is designed to bring financial services closer to the people of Enugu Ezike, facilitating easier access to banking and financial transactions.
This project is expected to create jobs, stimulate local businesses, and provide a much-needed boost to the local economy. In a region where such opportunities are rare, the MoMo PSB project represents a beacon of hope for many residents.
It is particularly baffling and disheartening to witness a member of the community collaborate with outsiders to hinder the progress of their own people.
The reasons behind such alliances remain unclear, but the impact of these actions is evident and deeply troubling. Working to obstruct the project is not only delaying progress but also actively working against the welfare and advancement of Enugu Ezike.
The efforts to destroy Kingsley Ifeanyi Adonu’s good intention, despite all the positive contributions he has made, are nothing short of wickedness.
Adonu, a visionary entrepreneur and the leading MTN Partner in the South East, has dedicated significant resources and efforts to bring the MoMo Payment Service Bank project to fruition.
His vision for the community includes economic growth, financial inclusion, and overall development. Attacking his vision is an attack on the progress and future of Enugu Ezike.
The question that lingers in the minds of many is: Why sabotaging our own benefits? In a time when unity and collective effort are paramount for the community’s advancement, such actions of sabotage are counterproductive and harmful. The community needs all hands on deck to drive development and improve the quality of life for its residents. Internal conflicts and malicious actions only serve to set back these efforts.
Despite the challenges and the malicious attempts to derail the project, it is important to reaffirm that S Mobile Group vision for establishing a MoMo Payment Service Bank in Enugu Ezike will prevail.
The community stands behind this vision, recognizing the immense benefits it promises to bring. Efforts to hinder progress will ultimately fail in the face of collective determination and support.
The actions of these ungrateful individuals, aimed at sabotaging the MoMo PSB project, are grave disservice to the community of Enugu Ezike.
In a time when progress and development are desperately needed, such malicious activities are deeply regrettable.
However, the vision and determination of Kingsley Ifeanyi Adonu and the community’s support ensure that the project will succeed, bringing much-needed growth and prosperity to Enugu Ezike.
Let it be known that no amount of sabotage can dim the light of progress and unity.
Nwodo, a public commentator writes from Enugu State
Columnists
Cybersecurity in 2024: Towards Ever Greater Sophistication of Tactics
Writer: CHESTER WISNIEWSKI, Director Global Field CTO, Sophos
With 2024 fast approaching, what are the results for 2023 and what are the developments in the threat landscape for this new year?
The year 2023 was marked by persistence in the tactics of cybercriminals, with the predominance of ransomware, the exploitation of vulnerabilities, theft of credentials and even attacks targeting the supply chain. The common point in all his attacks is their formidable effectiveness.
It is therefore essential to ask what trends will persist in 2024 and what strategies businesses should adopt to deal with these future cyber threats.
Between persistent trends and evolving cybercrime tactics
In 2024, the threat landscape is not expected to change radically, particularly with regard to attack typologies and criminal tactics and procedures.
Criminal groups still primarily focus their attention on financial gains and ransomware remains their weapon of choice. These cybercriminals tend to take the easy way out by opportunistically attacking unpatched security vulnerabilities.
The recent Citrix Bleed attack demonstrated the agility of cybercriminals when it comes to quickly and effectively exploiting these new vulnerabilities.
However, once patches are applied to these vulnerabilities, cyberattackers tend to revert to more common strategies of stealing credentials or, failing that, cookies or session cookies, which, while slightly slower, constitute always a proven means that allows them to penetrate within a system.
In 2024, however, we should expect increased sophistication in defense evasion tactics, particularly due to the generalization of certain technologies such as multi-factor authentication. These attacks will combine malicious proxy servers, social engineering techniques and repeated authentication request attacks or “fatigue attacks”.
AI and regulations will continue to shape cybersecurity
In 2024, the development of AI will have a positive impact on the efficiency of IT teams and security teams by enabling them to strengthen defenses and work more efficiently, including through the processing of vast volumes of data in the aim of detecting anomalies. It should make it possible to respond more quickly in the event of an incident.
Indeed, analysis of attacks in 2023 showed a shortening of the time between network penetration and the triggering of a final attack – using malware or ransomware. The need for rapid detection and response tools to prevent costly incidents is therefore essential.
Finally, regulatory developments could have a major influence on measures taken against ransomware. The need to take more substantial measures could push some states to penalize the payment of ransoms, which would represent a brake on malicious actors and change the perspective of companies in the event of an attack.
Other stricter legislation, such as the implementation of the European NIS2 Directive, is also expected to force companies to take additional measures, particularly regarding their abilities to collect data sets.
To protect themselves against increasingly rapid, effective and costly attacks, companies will need to strengthen their defenses by equipping themselves with tools that allow them to detect and respond to incidents more quickly.
The worsening cybersecurity talent shortage does not appear to be as serious as some studies claim. On the contrary, companies have implemented more lax hiring criteria and more open-mindedness in the recruitment process.
From this perspective, to guarantee their survival in a constantly evolving threat landscape, companies have every interest in establishing partnerships with cybersecurity experts whose main mission is to make the hyperconnected world safer, to advise and assist them. in setting up effective defenses.
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