GR Diary
Why do men kneel on a knee to propose?
By: Nmerichukwu Igweamaka
For many people, proposals are supposed to be the kind of romantic whirlwind you’ve only ever previously experienced while reading fairytales.
The love of your life gets down on one knee, triggering you to plummet into some kind of alternate universe where you’re surrounded by rose petals, dimly-lit candles, heart-shaped balloons and general happy, warm feelings.
But if you think about it, it’s actually kind of odd; the getting down on one knee bit. We get that it’s tradition and stuff – but if you really think about it, what on earth has a man got to gain by hobbling down onto one knee? Aside from the fact it puts him at roughly the right height to literally reach for your hand in marriage, obviously.
The idea of kneeling on one knee as essential to the standard proposal is not enshrined in history; it appears to be a largely modern invention, but it’s not clear how it originated.
The engagements we know most about in history are the ones between nobles and the wealthy, and those were often in the manner of business arrangements, with none of this “kneeling before your beloved” stuff. In fact, paintings of noble betrothals in history invariably depict both parties as standing or seated; no kneeling shows up at all.
One possible origin of the modern kneeling ideal is in the Middle Ages tradition of courtly love, in which a man of good birth essentially devoted himself (complete with poems, odes, deeds of honor, and general vassalage) to a noblewoman he perceived as superior.
The entire principle of this popular attitude was that the man was a kind of servant to the woman, whom he idealized beyond all reality; and he performed his servitude by kneeling, spiritually and figuratively. (Whether they ever actually got together is a matter of historical debate.
Probably not, in a lot of cases; many of the women in question were married.) Kneeling represented feudal surrender and admiration. Historians have actually had arguments about whether certain medieval images show men kneeling to their courtly loves, or to their male masters.
But kneeling in general in European history which was imitated by Africa has been a sign of supplication, humility, and servitude.
A lot of Christian iconography of prayer, for instance, involves kneeling, expressing your service to and debasement before God; and it’s also been pointed out that kneeling between men was a big sign of status.
Knights kneeled before their lords to receive honors, and surrendering armies kneeled before their conquerors. Kneeling to the woman you’re going to marry may be part of the same thing: a request for her favor and a physical demonstration of loyalty and surrender.
It seems to have first shown up in the 19th century, but as to why, your guess is as good as mine.
The Ring
The first reliable records of engagement rings for women, declaring that they would in the future be married to a specific man, dates to the Roman period, where betrothed women were given a gold ring to wear in public and an iron one to wear at home while doing household tasks.
But rings themselves as engagement symbols were likely around for many centuries, but they turn up in law at several points.
The Visigothic Code, a set of Spanish laws from the 7th century, declared that betrothal rings, like pledges in business, could not be revoked once they were given; you had to get married. Pope Nicholas I in 860 attempted to make an expensive, gold engagement ring legally necessary, so that men would make a significant monetary sacrifice and take the marriage seriously.
And the idea of a “betrothal” as a legal period of time (a gap between the intention to get married and actually performing the ceremony) was enshrined in Christian church law in 1215. Pope Innocent III declared that there had to be a waiting period between wanting to get married and being able to do it legally “so that if legitimate impediments exist, they may be made known”. (Impediments, as we all know from Jane Eyre, usually consisted of there being previous wives and husbands still living.)
The first recorded engagement ring with diamonds dates back to 1477, but it didn’t involve a solitaire; the ring in question was a gift from Archduke Maximilian of Austria to the noblewoman he was courting, 20-year-old Mary of Burgundy.
The famous jewelers Harry Winston describe the ring as “a delicate band adorned with diamonds in the shape of her first initial”.
Mary of Burgundy was a hugely powerful woman, and had her choice of eminent suitors, so this first diamond “engagement” ring probably wasn’t the thing that won her affection; it’s likely she’d selected Maximilian for her hand and he gave her the ring to cement the arrangement. (Tragically, Mary died after a horse riding accident at the age of 25.)
After Mary of Burgundy, the real beginnings of the diamond engagement ring tradition only emerge in the late 1800s, when a mining company struck rich seams of diamonds in Africa and formed a jewelry department, De Beers, to deal with it.
De Beers’ master stroke came in the 1930s and ’40s, when it employed a hugely successful “Diamonds Are Forever” advertising campaign to insist to the American population that diamonds were scarce, expensive, and the only viable way in which to propose marriage.
De Beers consciously created the status of the diamond engagement ring, and it still goes down as one of the most successful advertising ideas of all time: diamond engagement rings are, in most Western countries, now seen as the only acceptable option when a man declares his intention to marry you.
Credits: dailyadvent
The stage is set, the anticipation is palpable, and the excitement is already building as SIFAX Group unveils its lineup of top gospel artists for the much-anticipated 2024 SIFAX Group Thanksgiving and Night of Praise celebration.
The event is set to hold on Thursday, December 12, 2024, at the Lagos Marriott Hotel, Ikeja, Lagos.
The night’s lineup features an array of celebrated gospel stars, including Bidemi Olaoba, Laolu Gbenjo, Beejay Sax, Adeyinka Alaseyori and Chigozie Wisdom.
The event will also feature performances from Woli Agba, Titilayo Eyinjujesu, Abosede Akande, Nonny Chorale and Daminator Dance Group.
Themed I will Rejoice, the event, which is in its second year, promises an uplifting atmosphere filled with soulful melodies, heartfelt prayers, and vibrant expressions of gratitude for the milestones and blessings of the year.
Dr. Taiwo Afolabi, Group Chairman, SIFAX Group, said the event was an avenue to appreciate God for his faithfulness in the outgoing year:
“We are thrilled to bring together our board, management, staff, clients and other stakeholders to celebrate the goodness of God we have enjoyed in 2024.
It has been an interesting year laced with a lot of challenges and accomplishments.
This Night of Praise reflects our commitment to showing gratitude to God for His divine support for our businesses and our people.”
Attendees can expect electrifying live performances, a vibrant choir, and opportunities for communal worship, all within a beautifully curated setting designed to uplift and inspire. The event will also feature special segments for praise, worship, and words of encouragement from renowned speakers.
The event will be livestreamed on all the company’s official social media channels to extend the experience to the company’s online community.
Events
Speakers to Discuss How to Restore Nigerians’ Confidence in the Judiciary
…A collection of eminently qualified personalities will on Friday November 29 engage in the discourse on how to bring back the confidence of Nigerians in the nation’s judiciary.
The event, the Gavel International Annual Lecture with the theme: “The Judiciary as the last hope of the common man, media and legal perspectives” will be hosting Prof Hope Eghagha, Mr. Richard Akinnola, Mr. Ebun-Olu Adegboruwa SAN, Mrs. Joke Layi-Babatunde, and Mrs. Asabe Waziri as the panel discussants.
The panel will be coordinated by Chief Anthony George-Ikoli SAN.
At the event, the Attorney General of the Federation and Minister of Justice, Prince Lateef Fagbemi will deliver the Keynote Address while Nigeria’s top business lawyer, Mr. Gbenga Oyebode MFR will serve as chairman Former General Secretary of the Nigerian Bar Association (NBA), Mr. Dele Adesina SAN will deliver the main lecture.
George-Ikoli is a former Attorney-General of Bayelsa State and the first Senior Advocate from the state. A passionate advocate of the Justice system, George-Ikoli will bring his wealth of experience to bear on the discussions.
Prof Eghagha, is a highly experienced teacher of English Literature and Literary Analysis at the Faculty of Arts, University of Lagos and researcher of dramatic theory and criticism.
He is a playwright, poet, novelist, biographer, columnist and member of The Guardian newspaper’s editorial board. Through his weekly newspaper opinion articles, he explores the complex challenges facing Nigeria.
Prof. Eghagha also served as the Commissioner for Higher Education in Delta State from 2009 to 2014. In 1999, he was named Honorary Colonel of the Commonwealth of Kentucky United States, and Honorary Captain of the Belle of Louisville.
A distinguished academic Eghagha was made appointed professor in 2010. He was also Acting Dean of the Faculty of Arts, University of Lagos in 2015 and Head of the Department of English, University of Lagos from 2016 to 2019. In December 2023, he was appointed Education Consultant to the Delta State Government.
Richard Akinnola is a legal affairs journalist, legal historian, media law specialist, media trainer, and author of 18 books on law, media, human rights and politics.
A respected law columnist, at various times, he was a pioneer staff of The Guardian, Vanguard, and Judicial Editor of the Concord Group. One of the founders of Civil Liberties Organisation (CLO), the first Human Rights body in Nigeria, established in 1987, he is currently Director, Centre for Media Law and Advocacy, member of the Board of Partnership for Justice and founder of Richard Akinnola Foundation and NGO that takes care of widows of journalists and activists. Akinnola is the publisher/Editor-in-Chief of COURTROOM; Publisher/Editor-in-Chief of MEDIA LAW and Publisher/Editor-in-Chief of CORRUPTION CASES JOURNAL.
Ebun-Olu Adegboruwa, Senior Advocate of Nigeria (SAN), is a well regarded rights advocate and legal luminary. Adegboruwa attended the Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile-Ife, the Nigerian Law School, Lagos, and was called to the Nigerian Bar in 1995. He served as counsel at Gani Fawehinmi Chambers from 1995 to 2000 and later founded his law firm, Ebun-Olu Adegboruwa & Co.
He has been an activist and rights crusader for most part of his life. He was the Public Relations Officer of the Student’s Union of Obafemi Awolowo University, and later the Union’s President.
He was a member of the Senate of the National Association of Nigerian Students and member of the Committee for the Defence of Human Rights, Civil Liberties Organization, Campaign for Democracy, President, GSM Subscribers and other Phone users Association of Nigeria and founder of Law and Justice Forum and Millennium Legal Support Services.
He is also a Pastor at the Redeemed Christian Church of God.
Mrs. Adejoke Layi-Babatunde is an alumnus of Obafemi Awolowo University, Ile Ife and the Nigerian Law School, Lagos. She is a results-driven and accomplished law publisher with an exceptional talent for developing and launching new publications. With a keen eye for detail and exceptional interpersonal and communication skills, Layi-Babatunde easily stands out and is well known for her collaborative approach to leadership.
She is an author and life coach and sits on several boards. She has featured as a keynote speaker in several national and international conferences. Her editorial board position at a legal entity covering Africa reflects her deep industry involvement.
She has spearheaded pivotal roles, including being Deputy CEO at Lawbreed Limited, driving publication of Supreme Court judgments and publications aimed at equipping lawyers for greater success as well as overseeing corporate social relations. Her blend of experience, skills, and commitment positions her as a valuable asset to organizations at various phases of growth and this has earned her several awards one of which is the ESQ Nigeria Legal awards Amazon of the Year 2021.
Mrs. Layi-Babatunde started her career at the Legal Department of Nigeria Industrial Development Bank (now Bank of Industry. She is a life member of WIMBIZ (Women in Business and Management), Lagos Chamber of Commerce & industry, Chairperson, Mentoring Committee of FIDA Lagos chapter and FIDA International Editorial Board and the vice-chairperson of the Professional Development Committee of the Ikeja chapter of the Nigerian Bar Association.
Asabe Waziri is a petroleum engineer and a respected professional in the oil and gas industry, with nearly three decades of experience. She is also the founder of the Asabe Waziri Justice Advocacy Initiative (AWJAI), an organization inspired by her profound encounter with injustice. Driven to help others navigate the complex Nigerian justice system, Asabe established AWJAI to address critical issues faced by vulnerable communities.
In just over a year, AWJAI has made significant strides in combating illegal evictions, gender-based violence, monitoring compliance with the Administration of Criminal Justice Act (ACJA), addressing professional misconduct, and tackling prison overcrowding.
The Publisher of Gavel International, Mustapha Ogunsakin explained that the 2024 annual lecture is designed to kick off conversations on the restoration of confidence of the Nigerian people in the nation’s judiciary which appears to be at an all time low.
“During the #Endsars protests in 2020, a very major court building, the Lagos High Court, Igbosere was razed by a mob. We saw the horrendous pictures of the burnt court, particularly one of the arsonists in a lawyer’s garb of wig and gown, with a machete in his hand. For me, that is very scary imagery. We must begin to restore the hope of the common man, if not in other organs of government, but in the judiciary. The other alternative is anarchy,” he said.
Ogunsakin posited that legal and media professions saddled with direct constitutional roles in the judicial system are best positioned to restore confidence in the judiciary. “While the role of the legal profession is statutory, the media has the responsibility to represent the people by covering and reporting court proceedings, except it has to do with national security or cases involving minors. That is why the constitution made provision for a public gallery in every court where journalists occupy to report cases and disseminate to the public,” he noted.
Gavel International has over the years hosted lectures and conferences in pursuit of its guiding principle — Rule of Law. In 2015, Gavel International presented a book, “For the love of their Nation, Lawyers as Agents of Change in Nigeria’’ authored by the publisher, Mustapha Ogunsakin.
The public presentation of this book was done by the then Vice President, Prof Yemi Osinbajo SAN. Others in attendance at the event include Mr. Eyitayo Jegede SAN, then the Attorney General of Ondo State, Chief Anthony George-Ikoli SAN, the first SAN from Bayelsa State and a former Attorney General of the State, Mr. Ade Ipaye and a host of others.
In 2020 when the COVID-19 pandemic raged, it managed to host a stellar webinar conference, bringing together some of the most brilliant minds across the country to discuss on the topic: “Media Coverage of Virtual Court Proceedings: Prospects and Challenges. Prof. Osinbajo delivered the Keynote Address and was joined by others like human rights activist, Femi Falana SAN, Bode Olanipekun SAN, Prof Chidi Odinkalu, Dr Reuben Abati to discuss the topic.
Events
Hamzat, Abiru To Speak on Impactful Empowerment For Nigerians At TheGazelleNews Annual Public Lecture
TheGazelleNews, a leading online newspaper, is set to host its much-anticipated annual public lecture on Thursday, December 5, 2024, at the Radisson Blu Hotel, Isaac John Street, GRA, Ikeja, Lagos.
This year’s lecture will focus on a topic of crucial national importance: “Poverty Alleviation: Fantasies, Expectations, and Realities of People’s Empowerment.”
The event will convene distinguished speakers, thought leaders, and government officials to address the challenges and practical solutions surrounding poverty reduction and empowerment in Nigeria.
It will feature Dr. Kadri Obafemi Hamzat, Deputy Governor of Lagos State, as the Guest Speaker, who is expected to bring a wealth of experience in governance and infrastructure development to the discourse. As the Keynote Speaker, Senator Mukhail Adetokunbo Abiru, a renowned legislator and financial expert, will share valuable insights into policy-driven approaches for sustainable poverty alleviation.
A dynamic panel discussion will follow, featuring prominent personalities: Engineer (Dr.) Adekunle Olayinka, FNSE – Special Adviser on Works to the Lagos State Government; Ms. Abisola Olusanya – Commissioner for Agriculture and Food Systems, Lagos State, who will provide perspectives on the agricultural sector’s role in empowering communities; Comrade Tosin Adeyanju – Executive Secretary of the National Lottery Trust Fund (NLTF), focusing on community development through structured funding and Honorable Rasaq Ajala – Executive Chairman, Odi-Olowo/Ojuwoye LCDA, who will be contributing insights on local government initiatives.
Goodwill messages will be delivered by: the Senate Leader, Senator Micheal Opeyemi Bamidele; the Chairman of the Senate Committee on Environment, Senator Yunus Abiodun Akintunde; the Chairman of Winners Golden Group, Honourable Idowu Osuolale Obasa; and the Special Adviser to the President on Public Communications and National Orientation, Chief Sunday Dare.
The event will be graced by prominent personalities in government and public service, with Nigeria First Lady, Senator Oluremi Tinubu, CON, serving as the Special Guest of Honour; Senate President, Senator Godswill Akpabio as the Chairman of the occasion and the Lagos State Governor, Mr. Babajide Olusola Sanwo-Olu, will be the Chief Host.
The Father of the Day is seasoned politician noted for his connection with the people especially at the grassroots level, Senator Ganiyu Olanrewaju Solomon (GOS), and Mother of the Day, Her Excellency Princess Adejoke Orelope-Adefulire, reflecting her longstanding commitment to social empowerment and women’s issues and of course her role as the Senior Special Assistant to the President on Sustainable Development Goals.
In a celebration of excellence and dedication to public service, TheGazelleNews will present its prestigious Lifetime Achievement Award to Prince Tajudeen Oluyole Olusi, Chairman of the Lagos State Governance Advisory Council (GAC).
A highly respected political figure and royal prince from the Akinsemoyin ruling house of Lagos, Prince Olusi has made impactful contributions as a former Lagos City Councilor, House of Representatives member in the Second Republic, and Commissioner in Lagos State. His award highlights a career marked by unwavering dedication to Lagos and its citizens.
The day’s proceedings will be hosted by the dynamic compère duo, Gbenga Adeyinka and Feyikemi Niyi-Olayinka, who promise to guide the audience through an engaging and memorable event.
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