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9 ways to talk to women and make them like you

Published

6 years ago

on

By: Nmerichukwu Igweamaka

Men are from Mars, women are from Venus. At least this is what we have been told.

There was a book written with that title awhile back and to me, it served to create the illusion that men and women are polar opposites in terms of species and have little hope of ever really understanding each other.

What this author did not realize is that men as individuals are very different from each other. You cannot start an argument with “Men are all ……” and not look ignorant, because all men aren’t anything.

The same is true with women. Not all women are alike. What makes each person wonderful is that they are individuals. They each have their own loves and hates, hopes and dreams.

I know this looks hopeless. If all women are different individuals with different tastes and ideas, how in the name of all things Holy can you learn to talk to each and every one of them? Fear not! What I am about to share with you is a secret. It is the secret of how to talk to anyone no matter who they are and to build interest and ultimately love with them.

Underneath the clothing of skin and bones, we are perfect people. We have crappy baggage and things in our past that haunt us but these things are not us and we know that.

No one likes to be reminded of the bad parts of themselves or their painful past. What we are most proud of is who we are innately. We are most proud of the perfect person underneath. When you talk to a woman (or a man or a child) look for the perfect person and talk to him or her.

In some people it is easier to see this perfect person than in others, and in some it is so hidden by strange pseudo personalities and other weird baggage that it is almost absent. If the person you are talking to makes it too hard to access that perfect person underneath, move on. Find someone who doesn’t have as much baggage. And whatever you do, don’t waste your time talking to pseudo personalities. They just aren’t worth it.

Practice this skill 

Go to the supermarket or somewhere where you will have to interact with people. When you get to the check out, find something you like about the checkout person.

I find that women love jewelry and take time and effort to choose and wear pieces that look nice. If you find a piece of jewelry on them and you comment favorably to them about it, you will be met with the person looking up and seeingyou and not some nameless, faceless person. They will automatically start feeling a little better about you.

This is the easy part. You don’t have to be dazzling or brilliant. All you have to be is a good listener and respond with things that are pertinent to the subject at hand. It really is a piece of cake.

For example, you have just commented favorably on a piece of jewelry (or a sweater or scarf) and the conversation has started. Generally they will tell you a little bit about the piece. “Oh, my mom bought it for me for my birthday!’ You then smile and say “What a great mom you have!” or something that you know she will agree with.

Resist with all your might the impulse to start talking about yourself. This conversation is all about her. If you keep this up each time you go through the checkout line, you will find that soon you are friends. From there an invitation for coffee is a perfect next step to get to know each other better.

There is no quicker way to make someone hate your guts than to take an opposing viewpoint to theirs and then try to convince them that they are wrong. Let’s say your adorable check out person has accepted your invite for coffee! Yay!  This is a big step. Don’t blow it now by trying to impress her with how smart, big, or strong you are, and how dumb, weak, and misguided she is. If you do this, this will be your last date and you will have no one to blame but yourself. Instead find things that you agree on.

If you disagree on politics, avoid that subject like a five day old burrito stub that you have just dug up from under the sofa because your negative comments on the subject will be just about as welcome. Stick to the things you wholeheartedly agree on and you will be fine.

Your adorable clerk is a woman. She has had her share of guys trying to cosy up to her and get close. Respect her by giving her space. Trying to move in too close when she is not ready for that is a violation of her limits. To her this may mean that if you violate limits now, who knows what limits will be violated when she allows you into her world?

Brush your teeth and comb your hair. Don’t stink at all! I know I shouldn’t have to say this but sometimes people don’t know they stink. Make sure you don’t! If you just had coffee and a cigarette, chew some gum or something!

Check your teeth and make sure you don’t have anything stuck in them. Don’t look all rumpled unless it is sexy rumpled. Pay a little attention to your wardrobe. Look clean and don’t wear old threadbare clothes. No one will respect you if you don’t respect yourself and your outward appearance is an indicator of your respect level for yourself.

Don’t worry if you are a little overweigh or feel you are too short or have any other personal attribute that bothers you. Most people don’t even notice these things. If they do and do not want to talk to you because of them, they are not worth it anyway. Move on! There are many wonderful ladies out there who are looking for a caring and nice person like you.

Most people love gifts but there are times when gifts are unwelcome. Let’s say you and your beautiful clerk are now having dinner together this evening. It is perfectly appropriate to give her flowers but don’t give her flowers, chocolate in a heart shaped box and a new car.

She does not want to be put under an obligation and too many gifts make her feel that she now has to do something for you. While this may sound great, it feels awful. Have you ever shown up at work and forgotten that it was pot luck day and you brought nothing? How did you feel? Did you go around telling everyone that you forgot it was pot luck day and then ate only chips? Did you sneak out the back and give the whole thing a miss because the obligation was just too much? Do you see what I mean?

If you want to impress her, wash and clean your car. Ask her what kind of movie she likes or what she likes to eat and make reservations at a restaurant you know she will love. Take time to create an evening that she will find magical. What will impress her is the care you took and the respect you had for her to take that time.

Remember! Not all women are desirable just because they are women or because they are pretty. A pretty snake can still kill you and a woman who is negative, antagonistic, or passive aggressive (also referred to as covertly hostile) will make your life, and the life of any children you may have, miserable.

Think ahead before getting serious. If you find that your future girlfriend is one of these types, give her a hearty “So long, farewell, auf wiedershen and don’t let the screen door hit you in the ass on the way out!”

A warm and loving woman with a twinkle in her eye and a sense of humor is far more desirable than a pretty psycho. Beauty can fade over time when it is only on the surface. Real beauty that you see when you see the perfect person underneath is forever. Life is a tough game and only someone who has integrity, compassion and commitment will be there for you when you really need her.

The others, if they are self centered or psycho will be long gone the minute you need a friend the most.

Let’s face it, even though you are wonderful, dazzling and brilliant, you may not be someone’s cup of cherries or bowl of tea as far as future boyfriend material is concerned. It happens. If it is clear that she does not want a relationship, then ok. You are not wrong and neither is she. Perhaps you can be friends. One can never have too many nice people in one’s life.

There you have it! The important information on how to talk to anyone. Now go forth young Jedi warrior and use your power for good. I expect an invite to your wedding or at least send me a slice of the wedding cake!

Credits: Thetrentonline.com

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Hamzat, Abiru To Speak on Impactful Empowerment For Nigerians At TheGazelleNews Annual Public Lecture

Published

2 weeks ago

on

November 11, 2024

By

TheGazelleNews

TheGazelleNews, a leading online newspaper, is set to host its much-anticipated annual public lecture on Thursday, December 5, 2024, at the Radisson Blu Hotel, Isaac John Street, GRA, Ikeja, Lagos.

This year’s lecture will focus on a topic of crucial national importance: “Poverty Alleviation: Fantasies, Expectations, and Realities of People’s Empowerment.”

The event will convene distinguished speakers, thought leaders, and government officials to address the challenges and practical solutions surrounding poverty reduction and empowerment in Nigeria.

It will feature Dr. Kadri Obafemi Hamzat, Deputy Governor of Lagos State, as the Guest Speaker, who is expected to bring a wealth of experience in governance and infrastructure development to the discourse. As the Keynote Speaker, Senator Mukhail Adetokunbo Abiru, a renowned legislator and financial expert, will share valuable insights into policy-driven approaches for sustainable poverty alleviation.

A dynamic panel discussion will follow, featuring prominent personalities: Engineer (Dr.) Adekunle Olayinka, FNSE – Special Adviser on Works to the Lagos State Government; Ms. Abisola Olusanya – Commissioner for Agriculture and Food Systems, Lagos State, who will provide perspectives on the agricultural sector’s role in empowering communities; Comrade Tosin Adeyanju – Executive Secretary of the National Lottery Trust Fund (NLTF), focusing on community development through structured funding and Honorable Rasaq Ajala – Executive Chairman, Odi-Olowo/Ojuwoye LCDA, who will be contributing insights on local government initiatives.

Goodwill messages will be delivered by: the Senate Leader, Senator Micheal Opeyemi Bamidele; the Chairman of the Senate Committee on Environment, Senator Yunus Abiodun Akintunde; the Chairman of Winners Golden Group, Honourable Idowu Osuolale Obasa; and the Special Adviser to the President on Public Communications and National Orientation, Chief Sunday Dare.

The event will be graced by prominent personalities in government and public service, with Nigeria First Lady, Senator Oluremi Tinubu, CON, serving as the Special Guest of Honour; Senate President, Senator Godswill Akpabio as the Chairman of the occasion and the Lagos State Governor, Mr. Babajide Olusola Sanwo-Olu, will be the Chief Host.

The Father of the Day is seasoned politician noted for his connection with the people especially at the grassroots level, Senator Ganiyu Olanrewaju Solomon (GOS), and Mother of the Day, Her Excellency Princess Adejoke Orelope-Adefulire, reflecting her longstanding commitment to social empowerment and women’s issues and of course her role as the Senior Special Assistant to the President on Sustainable Development Goals.

In a celebration of excellence and dedication to public service, TheGazelleNews will present its prestigious Lifetime Achievement Award to Prince Tajudeen Oluyole Olusi, Chairman of the Lagos State Governance Advisory Council (GAC).

A highly respected political figure and royal prince from the Akinsemoyin ruling house of Lagos, Prince Olusi has made impactful contributions as a former Lagos City Councilor, House of Representatives member in the Second Republic, and Commissioner in Lagos State. His award highlights a career marked by unwavering dedication to Lagos and its citizens.

The day’s proceedings will be hosted by the dynamic compère duo, Gbenga Adeyinka and Feyikemi Niyi-Olayinka, who promise to guide the audience through an engaging and memorable event.

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GR Diary

AfriTECH 4.0: Maida, Inuwa, Adeyanju, Alakija, others Unveiled as Speakers

Published

3 weeks ago

on

November 1, 2024

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AfriTECH 4.0 Speakers
AfriTECH 4.0 Speakers

The organizers of Africa Tech Alliance Forum [AfriTECH 4.0] have announced the distinguished lineup of speakers for this year’s Forum themed: “Leapfrogging Digital Transformation for Future of Africa’s Economy”.

Scheduled to hold on Thursday, November 07, 2024 at Oriental Hotels, Lekki, Lagos, Nigeria, AfriTECH 4.0 will bring together leading voices in technology, telecommunications, ecommerce, software, finance, emerging technologies and government to explore key innovations and challenges shaping Africa’s digital transformation.

AfriTECH has become one of Africa’s most anticipated technology events, and the 2024 edition will feature a stellar lineup of industry experts, innovators, and policymakers who will provide insights into how emerging technologies are propelling Africa’s digital economy.

Special Guests:

Dr. Aminu Maida, a distinguished leader in telecommunications and digital transformation, serves as the Executive Vice Chairman of the Nigerian Communications Commission (NCC).

With over two decades of experience in the ICT sector, Maida has become a pivotal figure in driving Nigeria’s digital economy, overseeing regulatory frameworks and initiatives that foster innovation, investment, and inclusivity in Nigeria’s telecom industry.

Kashifu Inuwa Abdullahi, CCIE, is a transformative leader in Nigeria’s technology landscape, currently serving as the Director General of the National Information Technology Development Agency (NITDA).

Under his guidance, NITDA has driven impactful initiatives supporting Nigeria’s digital economy, fostering innovation, digital skills development, and creating an enabling environment for tech startups and entrepreneurship.

He will deliver the keynote address at AfriTECH 4.0.

Professor Ibrahim Adepoju Adeyanju is the CEO of Galaxy Backbone, a key government-owned technology and digital infrastructure company. Under his leadership, Galaxy Backbone focuses on strengthening Nigeria’s digital ecosystem by providing secure and innovative ICT infrastructure to government agencies and businesses, supporting national development and e-governance initiatives.

Biram Fall, the Regional Managing Director, QNET, a leading e-commerce-based direct selling company.

In his role, Mr. Fall oversees QNET’s operations and growth strategies across several markets, focusing on enhancing regional reach and ensuring the company aligns with local business needs.

Known for his expertise in direct-​selling and his commitment to sustainable business practices, Fall has been instrumental in expanding QNET’s footprint in Africa and other emerging mar​kets.

Ebehijie Momoh is a renowned financial services leader with over 20 years of experience in banking and payment technology, currently serving as CEO of AfrigoPay Financial Services Limited, where she leads the company’s mission to provide innovative payment solutions across Africa.

With a background in financial services and a deep understanding of digital payments, Momoh brings extensive experience to her role, focusing on transforming​ the financial landscape through accessible, secure, and efficient payment systems.

Her leadership emphasizes financial inclusion, driving AfrigoPay’s efforts to reach underserved communities and promote economic empowerment across the continent.

Dr. Muhammed Sirajo Aliyu is a visionary leader in Nigeria’s information technology sector. He is the incumbent President of the Nigeria Computer Society (NCS), the foremost association of IT professionals in Nigeria.

With an extensive background in computer science, IT governance, and digital innovation, Dr. Aliyu brings over 25 years of experience to his role, where he champions the advancement of technology and professional development within Nigeria’s IT ecosystem.

Dr. Temitope Alakija, a renowned academic and statistician, is a Senior Lecturer in the Department of Statistics at Yaba College of Technology [Yabatech] Lagos. With a deep expertise in data science, statistical analysis, and quantitative research, Dr. Alakija is dedicated to advancing the field of statistics and training future leaders in data-driven decision-making.

Holding a PhD in statistics and with numerous publications, Dr. Alakija’s research contributions have significantly influenced both academia and industry, particularly within Africa. Her commitment to academic excellence and her role in fostering a data-literate society make her a highly respected figure in the statistical community.

Adesola Akinsanya – President, Nigeria Internet Registration Association (NiRA). Akinsanya brings decades of expertise to his role, where he advocates for technological innovation, professional growth, and policy advancement in Nigeria’s IT landscape..

Engr. Gbenga Adebayo, Chairman, Association of Licensed Telecommunications Operators of Nigeria (ALTON). Engr. Adebayo is a prominent figure in Nigeria’s telecommunications industry, with over 25 years of experience in telecom and ICT. He is known for his advocacy for industry development, regulatory reform, and the provision of accessible telecommunications services across Nigeria.

Tony Izuagbe Emoekpere – President, Association of Telecommunications Companies of Nigeria (ATCON). With an extensive background in telecom management, digital strategy, and regulatory advocacy, Emoekpere is dedicated to advancing Nigeria’s telecom industry and fostering an environment that promotes innovation, investment, and inclusivity.

Key Speakers for AfriTECH 4.0:

Engineer Ikechukwu Nnamani – CEO, Digital Realty (Nigeria). In his keynote presentation at AfriTECH 4.0, Engr. Nnamani is expected to share his expertise on building resilient telecommunications infrastructure to support Africa’s digital future.

For over 16 years under his leadership the Digital Realty datacenter in Lagos is rated the most interconnected facility in the West African sub-region being the number 1 peering point for the region and boosting all submarine cables in the region, long distance providers, metro fiber providers, mobile services providers, fixed services providers, OTT providers, Internet Exchange, VAS providers, and global Tier1 service providers, amongst others.

Other outstanding personalities confirmed as speakers include – Dr. Obadare Peter Adewale, Chief Visionary Officer, Digital Encode Limited; Mr. Emmanuel Amos, Founder – Programos Foundation/InnovationBed Africa; Chukwuebuka Ume-Ezeoke, Chief Technology Officer at CED Technologies; Dr. Oluseyi Akindeinde, Founder, Hyperspace Technologies; Happiness Obioha, Managing Director, Tecom Concepts Limited; Chukwuemeka Mbaebie, Convener, Lagos Blockchain Week; Akeem Ajisafe, Managing Director, Transblue Limited; Chika Nwosu, Managing Director, PalmPay; Jude Ozinegbe, Founder/Convener at Cyberchain; Mohammed Rudman, CEO, Internet Exchange Point of Nigeria [IXPN]; Dr. Ayotunde Coker, CEO Open Access Data Centres (OADC); Kehinde Ogundare, country manager, ZOHO [Nigeria]; Ayodeji Ogunmola, Director, Products Management at Northsnow Ltd; Oluwakayode Durodola, founder, Otuntech Limited; Lovelyn Okafor, Country Head, Nigeria at Newmark; Olaniyi Ibraheem, Business Development Manager (Africa) at UBankConnect; Adedamola Bowale, Co-founder & Technical Lead at Avancee Pinnacle, and Moniade Adeniyi, Product Innovation & Business Growth Strategist, Northsnow Ltd.

Meanwhile, innovationbed Africa is set to host “Startup Showcase” at AfriTECH, a session dedicating to startup finalists for this year’s United Nations World Summit Awards. Discussants include – David-Bobola Ojoawo, the Producer for Compas.AI; Stephen Adeyemo of Expertplug; Siro Collins, CEO of Advanced Engineering Center (AEC), WSA Winner 2023; Elijah Moses, Producer for VerionX; Rasheed Aliu Producer for LOOPBOX; Musami Umar Musam, founder of RollMal; David Ezeonyekwere, the founder of CheapMarketDeal, and Sule Wisdom David, the founder of CyclexAfrica.

QNET is the gold sponsor of AfriTECH 40. Silver Sponsors – Galaxy Backbone, Digital Realty, Digital Encode Ltd. Bronze Sponsors – CED Technologies, AfriGoPay, Tecom, Northsnow UK, Hyperspace Technologies, Palmpay, OADC.

Ecosystem Partners: NCC, NITDA,, InnovationBed Africa, ALTON, ATCON, NCS, IXPN, NiRA, Lagos Blockchain Week, Newmark Group, all are supporting AfriTECH 4.0.

Media Partners include; Techeconomy, NigeriaCommunicationsWeek, ITPulse, Ravenews, TechTrends.Africa, TechBuild.Africa, GrassRoots, DigiVation Network, TechLifewithUgo, BusinessMetrics, BusinessRemarks, SwiftReporters, TechTV, Africa Hyperscalers Media, CyberEra, ITRealms, DigitalTimes, TechnologyMirror, TechandBizNews, ITNewsNigeria.

“AfriTECH 4.0 will also feature interactive panel discussions, workshops, and exhibitions that will explore other critical topics such as artificial intelligence (AI), blockchain, fintech, smart cities, and sustainable innovation”, said Chike Onwuegbuchi, co-convener of AfriTECH. “We are grateful to the sponsors and partners”.  

“Attendees will have the opportunity to engage directly with the speakers, as well as network with other industry leaders, innovators, and investors”, he added.

Participation

Participation is free, but you are required to pre-register: https://bit.ly/3ZPdi88

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GR Diary

TestNigeria 3.0 Conference: Elevate Your QA Practices to Prevent Outages like CrowdStrike’s

….Sen. Salisu Shuaibu Afolabi, Chairman of the Senate Committee on ICT & Cybercrime, who will declare the conference open

Published

3 months ago

on

August 12, 2024

By

TestNigeria Conference 1.0

The Nigerian Software Testing Qualifications Board (NGSTQB) has announced plans for the TestNigeria 3.0 Conference, set to take place on September 26, 2024, at the prestigious Radisson Blu Hotel in Ikeja GRA, Lagos, Lagos State.

With the compelling theme “Security in the Spotlight: Safeguarding Digital Frontiers through QA,” the conference aims to address the critical role of quality assurance (QA) in enhancing the security of digital ecosystems.

Why Attend TestNigeria 3.0?

Speaking ahead of the event, Mr Boye Dare, president of NGSTQB, said that the recent CrowdStrike incident, where a defect caused widespread disruptions for banks, hospitals, and airlines, underscores the urgent need for rigorous QA processes.

“Millions of PCs displayed ‘blue screens of death,’ highlighting the essential role of comprehensive testing.

“CrowdStrike has since committed to enhancing their software testing protocols, improving error handling, and adopting staggered deployments to prevent future issues”.

Mr. Dare said that TestNigeria 3.0 will provide attendees with the insights and tools to prevent similar disruptions in their own organisations.

Key Benefits of Attending:

  • Learning from CrowdStrike’s Experience: Gain valuable insights into preventing large-scale outages. Understand the importance of thorough testing, robust error handling, and strategic deployment to safeguard your organisation against similar issues.
  • Expert-Led Sessions and Panels: Engage with industry leaders and experts in software testing and security. Participate in discussions covering the latest advancements, strategies, and technologies to enhance your QA processes.
  • Networking Opportunities: Connect with professionals across various sectors. Exchange ideas, share experiences, and build collaborations that can drive innovation and improvement in your QA practices.
  • Cutting-Edge Trends and Innovations: Stay updated on the latest trends and technologies in software testing. Learn how to integrate security into your QA processes to protect your digital frontiers and ensure the resilience of your software systems.
  • Professional Development: Benefit from the expertise of NGSTQB, a leading organisation dedicated to promoting excellence in software testing in Nigeria. Discover how the Test Maturity Model integration (TMMi) can aid in test process improvement and compliance.

Conference Highlights:

  • Elevating Security Consciousness in QA Practices: Prioritise security at every stage of the software development lifecycle to proactively identify and mitigate risks.
  • Integrating Security Testing into QA Processes: Incorporate methodologies like penetration testing, vulnerability assessment, and code review into your QA processes to address security weaknesses before they can be exploited.
  • Collaboration and Knowledge Sharing: Foster collaboration among QA professionals, cybersecurity experts, and industry stakeholders to collectively tackle evolving security challenges.
  • Regulatory Compliance and Governance: Align QA processes with regulatory mandates such as NDPR, GDPR, HIPAA, PCI DSS, and ISO/IEC 27001 to demonstrate commitment to safeguarding sensitive data and protecting privacy rights.
  • Empowering Stakeholders through Education and Training: Equip QA professionals with the necessary knowledge and skills to navigate the complex landscape of security and QA through continuous learning and professional development initiatives.

Special Guest of Honour:

“We are honoured to welcome Sen. Salisu Shuaibu Afolabi, Chairman of the Senate Committee on ICT & Cybercrime, who will declare the conference open. We will also welcome Hon. Adedeji Stanley Olajide, the Chairman House Committee for ICT and Cybersecurity who will deliver the Keynote Address.

“The presence of these great lawmakers underscores the importance of this event and the critical role of QA in national cyber resilience”, he said.

About NGSTQB:

The Nigerian Software Testing Qualifications Board (NGSTQB) is dedicated to promoting excellence in software testing and quality assurance in Nigeria. As a member of the International Software Testing Qualifications Board (ISTQB®) and the local chapter for The TMMi Foundation, NGSTQB strives to enhance professional standards and practices in software testing through certification, education, and collaboration.

For more information and to register for the conference, please visit https://www.ngstqb.ng/conference

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