Columnists
The recipe for a happy married life
Having been married all these years, one of the few lessons learnt is to gauge every situation and know when to save energy for the next fight, writes Dr. Osmund Agbo
Yesterday wifey asked that I join her in a quick trip to the store since we were running low on home supplies. Not exactly sure why I had to be dragged in amidst other competing demands of my time but hey!!
Having been married all these years, one of the few lessons learnt is to gauge every situation and know when to save energy for the next fight. Besides, I was told it was a way of spending time together, a white lie we both came to adopt for the sake of peace.
Anyway, the plan was to leave around 9 and be back latest noon since we needed to drop off our son to his friend’s birthday party. By nine-thirty we were still home and doing God-knows-what and so this discussion ensured.
What seems to be the problem I asked, turning around to look at her.
“Well… it’s not always as easy as you think. You men gotta understand women are beautifully made but do carry on just a little differently”, she said with a smirk on her face.
Apparently so, I shot back in a tone to convey my frustration on the issue.
But why though? I asked
It wasn’t like we were going for a wedding or even having a simple date. By the last count, she had changed over three items of dressing with no sign we were nearing the end . I was getting a little exasperated on why it was so much of a hassle to pick out what to wear for such an inconsequential trip to the grocery store.
Then I continued…
Okay, but why did you change the top with the flowery pattern? It went so well with the brown baggy pants and I think it flattered all your features so beautifully. Sometimes it’s tough to know exactly what women want.
She quickly arched forward ,looking a little excited.
Oh, so you were paying attention? Well thanks! But seriously how in the world could I have known that though? For all it seemed,I could have as well been changing in front of the blind and mute since you never said a word. But am glad you did. Better late than never, right?”, she asked, turning towards me and flashing what I interpreted to be a winning smile.
This was not the first time we had those little fights. I have always demanded that my time be respected though I never believed anyone cared. This last one was a little different. The whole time she took the high road and made me look like a jerk. Something I swore to pay her back in one way or another.
After the encounter, I tried unsuccessfully to shrug off the important message my wife tried to convey subtly. Oh so now am the guy who don’t even pay compliments? I tried to rationalize that married men are too busy to care about certain things. But truth has a way of stubbornly staring you in the face. It defies braggadocio. I was pretty sure that was not the first time I fell short in my husband duty, even though wifey was kind enough not to rub it on my face. That worried me and deep down my ego was a little bruised. The only way to make peace with myself and save face at the same time was to ask for some help. Later that night,I had an earful as I attentively listened and obediently yielded to her wise counsel. It was shameful that even fifteen solid years after one still felt like a rookie.
Women are truly a special breed. Their outlook, perception and expectation of life is a little different from us. She might get all the compliments in the world but non makes more sense than that from her man. Maybe it has to do with the comfort of knowing fully well that yours is always going to be the most genuine.
“How could I have known that you liked it since you never said anything?”
Those few words were enough to pull my senses back for a serious reality check. So I have been so busy or too careless to neglect an important part of marital responsibility. The lack of spousal appreciation. In marriage, it’s a cardinal sin and may be a reason why big problems sometimes grow out of little things. Unfortunately men, most especially African men including yours truly are very guilty of this.
There is something to be said about African men especially Nigerian men. They are excellent providers and can do anything to take care of the family. If you have to compete for a lady’s love with a Nigerian man, you better have strong edge in many other things. No matter how hard you try you might still find yourself lagging behind our legendary propensity to spend. The problem is that we tend to neglect so many other areas that are vital to a good relationship. Sometimes we come to believe that to the extent that we can meet a lady’s material needs, that all is well. Nothing could be further from the truth. Did the Bible not warm us that man shall not live by bread alone?
Anyway, needless to say we went to the store and for once yours truly was even happy to part with lots of Benjamin. Maybe it was over correction for past transgressions but it felt good anyway. We even followed it up with a little date in her favorite Olive Garden. To top it off, I had a big pot of Onugbu soup steaming right in front of me within minutes of getting back home. No questions asked.
I have since learnt my lessons. Life truly is a journey and we keep drifting off and pulling back. We just have to be humble enough to admit our mistakes and open enough to confess it.
A happy wife is a happy life.
Columnists
Cybersecurity in 2024: Towards Ever Greater Sophistication of Tactics
Writer: CHESTER WISNIEWSKI, Director Global Field CTO, Sophos
With 2024 fast approaching, what are the results for 2023 and what are the developments in the threat landscape for this new year?
The year 2023 was marked by persistence in the tactics of cybercriminals, with the predominance of ransomware, the exploitation of vulnerabilities, theft of credentials and even attacks targeting the supply chain. The common point in all his attacks is their formidable effectiveness.
It is therefore essential to ask what trends will persist in 2024 and what strategies businesses should adopt to deal with these future cyber threats.
Between persistent trends and evolving cybercrime tactics
In 2024, the threat landscape is not expected to change radically, particularly with regard to attack typologies and criminal tactics and procedures.
Criminal groups still primarily focus their attention on financial gains and ransomware remains their weapon of choice. These cybercriminals tend to take the easy way out by opportunistically attacking unpatched security vulnerabilities.
The recent Citrix Bleed attack demonstrated the agility of cybercriminals when it comes to quickly and effectively exploiting these new vulnerabilities.
However, once patches are applied to these vulnerabilities, cyberattackers tend to revert to more common strategies of stealing credentials or, failing that, cookies or session cookies, which, while slightly slower, constitute always a proven means that allows them to penetrate within a system.
In 2024, however, we should expect increased sophistication in defense evasion tactics, particularly due to the generalization of certain technologies such as multi-factor authentication. These attacks will combine malicious proxy servers, social engineering techniques and repeated authentication request attacks or “fatigue attacks”.
AI and regulations will continue to shape cybersecurity
In 2024, the development of AI will have a positive impact on the efficiency of IT teams and security teams by enabling them to strengthen defenses and work more efficiently, including through the processing of vast volumes of data in the aim of detecting anomalies. It should make it possible to respond more quickly in the event of an incident.
Indeed, analysis of attacks in 2023 showed a shortening of the time between network penetration and the triggering of a final attack – using malware or ransomware. The need for rapid detection and response tools to prevent costly incidents is therefore essential.
Finally, regulatory developments could have a major influence on measures taken against ransomware. The need to take more substantial measures could push some states to penalize the payment of ransoms, which would represent a brake on malicious actors and change the perspective of companies in the event of an attack.
Other stricter legislation, such as the implementation of the European NIS2 Directive, is also expected to force companies to take additional measures, particularly regarding their abilities to collect data sets.
To protect themselves against increasingly rapid, effective and costly attacks, companies will need to strengthen their defenses by equipping themselves with tools that allow them to detect and respond to incidents more quickly.
The worsening cybersecurity talent shortage does not appear to be as serious as some studies claim. On the contrary, companies have implemented more lax hiring criteria and more open-mindedness in the recruitment process.
From this perspective, to guarantee their survival in a constantly evolving threat landscape, companies have every interest in establishing partnerships with cybersecurity experts whose main mission is to make the hyperconnected world safer, to advise and assist them. in setting up effective defenses.
Columnists
Atiku and Asiwaju’s Economic Management as the Only Good Still Left of Nigeria’s Economy
Article By Hashim Suleiman
When once a society derails from encouraging robust conversations from all divides and objective ones at that, it has basically lost the most common basis for development and some of us have taken it a duty to bring these points to bare, perhaps we may see the light and begin to open up these conversations for the gullible, the half-gullible, upcoming ones and those who may have missed out on certain points.
As our democracy is growing through natural tendencies and less citizenry efforts, so many of the citizens seem to be forming this holier than thou character which appears to denigrate the efforts that certain patriots have sacrificed to achieve regardless of how imperfect, recall that same people could even do worse if given same opportunity because a lot of their opinions are not borne out of criticality but rather beer parlor talks, bandwagon and a general character of mischief that promotes pulling down people.
I have said in several fora that I’d be grateful if God can bless me as much as He did Obasanjo and so many others, this is to dissuade those young people who could be easy to throw tantrums and insult on these statesmen without understanding that they only gave what they had under the prevailing circumstances.
They also do this some other times for support of their political icons forgetting that the entire elites are friends and bare no grudge less for political bashings that remain basically games to them.
Accordingly, I’d like to remind the citizenry of the exceptional strides that Atiku Abubakar and Bola Tinubu had put in to our economy which remains the only bedrock that is still keeping the economy of the country moving. Everyone practically latches on them to be able to pull of some achievements of government.
You may recall that Atiku as the chairman of the economic management of the country between 1999 to 2007 opened the economy to the world by simply assembling sound brains who had the KnowHow and he monitored alongside his boss to ensure they delivered the much they did.
He first identified government had no business doing business and they quickly lobbied the National Assembly to pass the Act on privatization which saw to the setting up of the Bureau of Public Enterprises that was headed by Nasiru Elrufai himself a recruit of Atiku Abubakar to midwife the sale of government businesses that are today still functional like Ntel which provides one of the best bundle services in Abuja, Lagos and Portharcourt.
Regardless of how imperfect, it’s still employing thousands and standing on its feet, imagine what could have happened to her if it was not privatized. So many of the private Telcos are leveraging on their infrastructure to do business, some monies are changing hands through that too.
Recall also that all the policies around IPPIS, GIFMIS, TSA, FIRS etc which ensures mop up of revenues and discourages wastages were babies of an Okonjo Iweala and her lieutenants like Okauru and others. Atiku Abubakar equally shopped these individuals and supervised them to ensure deliveries, every government policies afterwards has leveraged on these policies to be able to make something good of their economic policies.
Nuhu Ribadu was equally recommended by Atiku for recruitment to pilot the setting up of the EFCC and it’s not in doubt how that institution has remained what every administration uses to attempt to fight the almighty corruption.
It was indeed robustly set up as it has stood the test of time. People would accuse him of privatizing to himself and same people will today say he is broke but I have never seen one person that has pointed to what Atiku sold to himself till today.
This space will not be enough to highlight all of Atiku’s economic strides in that era but I have highlighted enough to get people to begin to research and perhaps expand the conversation.
On the other hand, Asiwaju’s economic management of Lagos did no small help to the Nigerian economy as every other Nigerian leaders that have emerged after 2007 have had to leverage on the revenues from Lagos to ramp up VAT collections and subsequent sharing by all tiers of government.
The opening up of the city to beautiful infrastructure had provided an opportunity for the entertainment industry to blossom leading to influx of Forex through international shows as well as the provision of ample employment opportunities.
Little wonder why the young entertainers in lagos don’t care who the next president is, they would rather organize a carnival of a protest like ENDSARS and share food to themselves while dancing- ‘catching cruise’ like it’s said in local parlance.
Asiwaju’s human capital development has also led to the availability of human resource to manage the very difficult task of managing critical sectors. President Muhammadu Buhari would thank such efforts as it provided him ample Human Resources to utilize for his administration.
Therefore, the 2023 elections have presented very fine gentlemen who have utilized their times and opportunities to leave a mark that is undeniable in the history of our dear nation no matter how imperfect. I would continue to wonder who would celebrate ours for us if not us, there is absolutely no reason to continue to denigrate these individuals considering more of the fact that they have learnt appropriate lessons to improve on the lot that they have both achieved if given another opportunity. Recall also that we may not be able to do better if given the opportunity.
Consequently, I submit that head or tail Nigeria stands to benefit from the outcome of the 2023 elections, let us support appropriately, improve the conversations, reduce the bitterness and imbibe optimism and positivity for the hope of a better nation going forward.
God bless Nigeria. Hashim Suleiman can be reached via [email protected]
Columnists
OBITUARY: The memory of Dr Mike Okolo will remain positive and pleasant | Chido Nwakanma
Culled from THE PUBLIC SPHERE with Chido Nwakanma
One week later, the shock of the sudden departure of Dr Mike Okolo is wearing out. But not so the pain and bewilderment. And not the pathos.
Dr Mike Okolo, Dean of the School of Media & Communication, Pan Atlantic University, passed to the beyond on 6 June 2020 suddenly and without any visible or known ailment.
It stunned his immediate and extended family, including the university he had served for so long.
Okolo was a corporate communication consultant with vast experience in all aspects of corporate/public affairs. He had a track record in Internal Communication, Issues and Crisis Management, Event Management and Communication Audits.
He also taught Public Speaking and Presentation Skills.
Okolo had a PhD in Sciences from the University of Benin (1982), an MSc in Strategic Communication at the University of Central Lancashire (2014), and a 2020 PhD in Communication from the University of Navarra, Spain.
He was the pioneer Corporate Affairs Manager of the Lagos Business School and also served as Alumni Relations Director. He was a classroom maestro: fair, firm, and considerate.
Visiting is painful because of seeing how this loss affected his partner, friend and wife, Mrs Rosemary Okolo, erstwhile Registrar of the Pan Atlantic University and faculty in the School of Management. They were the ideal couple, even sharing lunch time together.
Visit you must, though, bearing in mind the message of Solomon.
Eccl. 7:2-4: “It is better to go to the house of mourning than to go to the house of feasting: for that is the end of all men, and the living will lay it to his heart. 3 Sorrow is better than laughter: for by the sadness of the countenance, the heart is made better. 4 The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the house of mirth.”
Dr Mike Okolo was the Dean of the School of Media & Communication. It was a richly deserved appointment in 2020 after the NUC forced on him a circuitous journey to a second PhD that paid no heed to his contributions to setting up the school. He stepped down the first time following NUC refusal on the grounds of lacking a PhD in communication and then set out to get it.
That journey epitomized Dr Okolo. He was focused, dedicated and committed. When and if he sets out on a course, he stays on it until accomplishment.
He was dapper in the best traditions of the corporate world.
The Fundamental Fs of Life mattered to the late academic. The Fundamental Fs are faith, family and friends. There are two other Fs of fame and fortune, but the Fundamental Fs speak to the essence of life.
The Three Fs that mattered to Dr Okolo play out boldly in his passing. Even in their sorrow, the Okolo family not only affirm their faith but also evangelises. As you sign the condolence register, they offer you an Opus Dei prayer card. Okolo belonged to Opus Dei, a prelature of the Catholic Church that urges Christians to find God in their daily lives and sanctify their work. “Wherever your yearnings, your work, your affections are, that is the place for your daily encounter with Christ. It is there in the midst of the most material things of the earth, that we must sanctify ourselves, serving God and all people”, in the words of Saint Josemaria Escriva, founder.
I had the privilege of teaching two Okolo children as undergraduates. They reflected good breeding or what I now term WBU children. Well Brought Ups (WBU) are a walking statement of the values of their families. These children were ideal students: they were studious, dedicated and focused. They comported themselves so decorously no one could tell that their parents were part of senior management, unlike many children in such positions. No surprise that they graduated with the highest honours.
Dr Okolo had a stern appearance until he offers his beatific smile. His smile is warm, friendly and reassuring. Oh, I should say was. It is still difficult to speak of him in the past tense.
Okolo led a team of postgraduate students to Birmingham City University as part of course requirements. Years of teaching professionals guided his conduct. He provided guidelines and then allowed everyone to express themselves.
Okolo was scrupulous and meticulous in every endeavour. He cared about nutrition and fitness. On that trip, he enjoyed the long walks on the campus of the University of Oxford. Walking was a regular pastime. It was thus strange to hear of a sudden cough and heart attack as the immediate cause of his death. This life is soChukwuma.
Take heart, dear Okolo family that Dr Mike left behind. You have a solid foundation of nurture and extensive goodwill that business managers now recognise as a tangible asset with strong valuation. Take heart, SMC family, academic and professional colleagues. The memory of Dr Mike Okolo will remain positive and pleasant.
The mortal remains of Dr Mike Okolo will be committed to mother earth on 24 June 2022 after masses in Lagos and Asaba.
[NB: This article was first published on Mr. Nwakanma’s FB page]
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